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Howard said he had to move on to this Sybian ride thing. He said today is the 123rd Sybian ride and to mark the date they’re going to have the creator of the Sybian, Dave Lambert, come in to talk about the product. They also have porn star Raven Alexis coming in to ride it. They brought her in first. Howard said she’s very ”girl next door” looking.
Howard told David to get nude for the segment. Raven came in and said that she was wearing a vibrator necklace today and it has 5 different speeds. She said she was playing with it the whole time she was at the AVN awards.
Howard said Raven is very beautiful and he was very excited about this Sybian ride today. He said that they have to celebrate the 123rd ride today. He said that she won some AVN awards this year. He asked how long she’s been in the business. She said she’s been doing it for about 3 years. She said that she’s signed with Digital Playground and she thinks that’s why she’s getting so much attention lately.
Howard asked Raven if there is anything she hasn’t done yet. She said that she hasn’t done anal yet but she is willing to do that. Gary said that the Howard TV guys saw that she wasn’t wearing panties. Raven showed Howard and she definitely wasn’t wearing any.
Howard asked David if he was going to run the Sybian today. He said he can’t. He said he’d get in trouble if he did that. David said that this was the first vagina he’s seen in a long time. Howard told him that he should adopt Raven. Robin asked if they watch porn. David said that they do… but not together.
Howard asked Raven when she got into porn. She said she was about 20-21 and she was on her way to visit a friend and there were like 3 people on the plane. She said that she was sitting by herself and this girl came up to her in the back and sat next to her. She was telling bits and pieces of the story so Howard said that if Courtney Cox is listening, David is beating off.
Howard got back to the story and Raven told Howard about how she and this girl got into this discussion about being bi-sexual and they started touching and kissing. She said that she was the one who started in with the other woman. She said they were in the back so no one was bothering them back there. She said they ended up eating each other out right there in the seats. She said that they didn’t even go to the bathroom to do it.
Howard said that David was taking pictures with his cell phone. David said that he’s going to get into so much shit for this.
Howard asked Raven if she ever saw that woman again. She said she never did. She said it was just the one time. Howard asked David if Courtney’s labia look as nice as Raven’s do. David said they do. Howard said she has very nice labia. Howard said he thinks that she’s David’s type too because she likes to get dressed up in outfits and go to parties and stuff.
Howard asked Raven about what kind of parties she likes to go to. She said she loves costume parties. She said she has a Star Trek uniform. She gave them the Spock ”Live long and prosper” hand signal. Howard asked if she knows much about Star Trek. She said she’s still young so she’s going back and watching the old stuff now. She said she just got into it. Howard asked if she knew what a Tribble is. She didn’t know but she’s young.
Howard read about Raven liking how she likes it when people wear masks during sex. She also likes a bunch of other stuff like guys cumming on her face. She doesn’t think that’s degrading at all. Howard said his therapist tells him it is.
Howard read that Raven was admitted into Harvard law school but she turned it down. Howard asked why she didn’t go. She said she didn’t think it was for her. She got into nude modeling and then into porn.
Howard read that she pleasures herself like twice a day. She said that’s true. She said that she enjoys sex and she loves doing porn. She said she’s actually married with two kids and she’s only 23. David said it’s like his mom all over again. Howard said his mom was a pin up girl aback in the 50s.
Howard said that Raven gave herself 100 orgasms in a day once. She also masturbated while driving 80 miles per hour on the highway. She said she thinks that was a bad idea but she did it. Howard said she’s one hot chick. He gave her some plugs for her web site RavenAlexis.com and other stuff.
Howard said they’re going to have the creator of the Sybian come in while Raven rides it during the 123rd ride on the show.
Howard had Dave Lambert come in after that. Howard said he’s the creator of the product. David Arquette was laughing when he came in. Howard asked Dave how all of this came up. Dave said that he’s almost 80 and he didn’t want to talk about how he got into all of this. He said that his life experiences gave him enough to make him able to analyze the world by his standards so he knew they needed this product. Howard asked if he was a sex therapist or something. He said he was actually a dance instructor for 35 years. Howard said he must have been banging a lot of chicks and he wasn’t giving them orgasms. Dave said he found out that many women weren’t having orgasms and he figured out that they needed this machine.
Howard said he really appreciates him creating this product and bringing it to his show. He said he’s had Jenna Jameson and Carmen Electra ride it before. Dave said he saw both of those rides.
Howard asked Dave more about what he had discovered and how he came up with the idea to invent this machine. Dave said after many years he went about the idea of inventing it and designing it. Howard said it’s a pretty sophisticated machine. He said they have a lot of things going on. Howard asked if he sketched it out on paper first. Dave said it was a mental thing. He said he went through hundreds of different versions. He said if you watch the documentary you’ll see some of the original designs. Howard asked how many deaths occurred during the designing. Howard joked that 23 had died but Dave said it was zero.
David Arquette was laughing his ass off during the whole interview. Howard asked if he got it patented. He said that they turned it down because there were some designs from the 1700s that described something similar.
Howard asked if they looked for test pilots for this thing. Dave said that they had some people who were around him that would try it out. They went to swing clubs and tried them out once they got some of the first designs worked out. Dave said that a doctor helped him develop the product. David asked if any vaginas had ever caught on fire. He said that they hadn’t. Howard asked Dave if he had ever tried it out himself. He said he had. He said that he has had many orgasms on it while holding a woman who is using it. He said they sell the Venus 2000 as well so he’s used that.
Howard asked Dave how old he is. He said he’ll be 80 in October if he lives that long. Howard asked if he can still have sex at his age. Dave said he didn’t want to answer that question. Howard said that’s too bad because he should be having sex. He invented the Sybian. Howard asked why he doesn’t try Viagra or something. He said he has no desire to do that.
Howard asked if the Sybian makes him money. Dave said he does. He said that he makes money and he’s always made money. He said they have had increases in their annual sales up until this year. Howard asked how many they sell. He said he can’t answer that exactly but it’s in the tens of thousands, not the hundreds of thousands.
Howard asked Dave if he’s made millions off of this thing. Dave said he had. He said he’s rich by his own standards but he didn’t say what those standards are.
Howard said that they were going to do the Sybian ride today. Dave asked if he could control it and control how it’s used. Howard said that they don’t do insertion there. Howard said they’re not allowed to do that. He said that they just have women sit on it. Dave said that’s only a portion of the stimulation. He thought that they had done insertion at some point. Howard said they hadn’t.
Dave said he thinks that if they allow him to control it they’ll see some things that they have never seen before. Howard said he was getting kind of creeped out.
Robin asked if they’re still working on the Sybian or are they done. He said he hasn’t changed it for about 22 years because he thinks he designed it just the right way.
Howard had Raven go over to the Sybian and gave her some plugs. He said that Dave is going to be an some awards show on Saturday night.
Gary said that Dave didn’t want to use the set up they had. Howard begged him to just do it with what they had. Dave said he wishes that they’d allow him to use it the way they’d use it in their home. He wanted it on the floor the way it would be at home. Howard said that he didn’t want to get into that and they can’t start taking things apart.
Gary asked David Arquette if he has to call home and tell Courtney what happened before someone else does. David said he probably will. Howard said a happy birthday to Courtney and David’s daughter while they were talking about that.
Howard asked Dave what he wanted to do with the Sybian. He said he wanted to put it on the floor and he wanted to hold her while she was using it. He said he had permission from her to do that. Howard asked if she really wanted to experience that. Raven said she was fine with that and she wanted to experience it.
The Howard TV guys came in and took the Sybian apart so they could put it on the floor. Gary said it was like a pit crew. They took it apart and put the Sybian on the floor. Howard said he thinks that Raven just ran out of the room. Robin said she thought this was supposed to be about fun.
Dave had the guys put the Sybian on a mat and then they got started. David said that this was ruining the visual with Dave in the shot. David said it was very creepy. Will said that Dave was grabbing Raven’s ass. Dave was hugging her during the ride too. Dave was mumbling something to her as he turned up the power. Raven was moaning and Dave kept jacking up the power. He was saying stuff to her as she was trying to get off. Raven said she was cumming and Dave told her to say it loud so they could all hear it. Dave kept her going and she was yelling and cursing as she was cumming. Dave kept her going time after time. Dave told them to let her go.
Howard told Dave to let her up because it sounded like he was killing her. Dave told her to keep her eyes closed but Howard wanted to end it. Dave said he was going to go again. He let her rest for a few seconds and then started it up again. Raven said that she could go again. Dave told her to go again. She was moaning as he had the power surging up and down. Dave told her to just let it out. Dave wanted her to go again but Howard jokingly said they just got a call from the actual inventor of the Sybian and he was stuck at the airport.
Howard told Dave that was something. Gary had Raven get up. Howard asked if she was okay. She said that was the best ride she’s had. She said she had about 15 or 20 orgasms. Dave said that he told them that they’d see something they’d never seen before. Howard said it was the weirdest thing he’s ever seen. Robin said they saw an old man giving a girl a Sybian ride.
Howard said he thinks that Raven is in love with Dave. He gave them both some plugs and said it’s going to be good on Howard TV. He said that Raven is a knock out, especially for an 80 year old. Dave said he didn’t get an erection though. Raven asked if Arquette got one. David said that Dave pretty much killed it for all of them. Gary said he wasn’t sure about an erection but he hasn’t laughed that hard in a long time.
Dave said that the Sybian is getting an award tonight at some awards show. Dave told Howard that most women can go on much longer than they did today.
David asked if he could get a discount on one. Howard asked if David would do that with his wife. David said he would.
Howard took a call from a woman who said that this was just creepy. She said that they have a lot of cutting edge stuff on the show but this was just creepy. JD came in and said that he got a note from someone saying that Raven was into Necro porn.
Ralph called in and said that this was the creepiest thing he’s ever heard on the show. He said that they should get Arquette on the thing. David was laughing his ass off at what was going on in there. Howard wrapped up and went to break a short time later.